Well, today, something happened and I really do not know what to do.
My sister in law called me into the bathroom to look at my niece's privates, she had cuts and scratches that did not look like they came from her scratching. A few looked like tears!!
I told my sister in law that it did not look like just scratches. My niece is 7 years old. I talked to her and explained to her about good touch and bad touch. I was telling her that if anybody has done anything to her, she needed to tell us so, we can make it stop. I expained that she will not be in trouble and everything will be ok. I asked her if anybody had done anything to her and she started crying. She wouldn't say anything but, the way she started crying made me sick to my stomach.
I told her mom, her mom started yelling at her for making me think bad things!
I told her mom to give me a chance to tak to her because, all she was doing was scring this baby. She says ok but, remember she has lied about all kinds of stuff before. It seemed to me like she already knew what happened but, didn't want anybody to know. I taked to her again and she cried and finally said I can't say anything, I will get in trouble. She refused to say anything and I was pissed at my sister in law!!! How could she scare her child into not saying anything?!
I told her if you really love your daughter, take her to the IMSS so, they can check her, they can tell if it is scratches or something worse. She said ok but, when her husband got home from work. when he got home, she never woud take her. I was pissed, we left to get something to eat and when we returned they were gone.
My mother in law said she went to the Similares to get medicine for her infection!!! The fucking similares does not do anything, they never even check your throat when you go for a sore throat and that is in my opinion why she went there.
This baby has horrible tears and can't hold her pee or anything. She was left alone for a few hours wiht our nephew who is 12 years old and that was the only time something could have happened, other times she is with lots of people.
I feel sick and disgusted by this and do not know even what to do. My niece won't say anything and I am no Dr but, it sure as hell looks like more than scratches like my sister in law says it is. Supposively this is what the Similares said also.
I told her to take her to the IMSS today to just be sure she got the correct medicine, hoping she would and they woud check her for real, she said she would but, I really do not believe her (SIL). Nobody else in this family except for me knows and nobody will believe me. God forbid I ruin their perfect family!!!
Also, I know if I tell someone, they will know it was me and then, I will be kicked out with my kids, no money and no where to go. Miguel would leave with me but, we have no money to even get a hotel for a night. So, this makes me think, my kids are my priority but, I know I have to help her. I can't stand by and let something like this happen. AT the least this baby needs therapy.
This is killing me, I need to get her help but, do not even know how to do it. I can't let everybody know I did. The nephew is the family favorite so, they will do anything to protect him. Anybody, please give me some advice, SIL is not even allowing her to go to school this week, in my opinion out of fear she will tell someone.
If I was in the US, I woud have called the police or Child Protective Services but, here I don't know who to contact at all. The police do not do their job here in Monterrey and will only want money and nobody wil back me up on this, they will ony go against me and this child has probably been told not to say anything at all or else.
Hi Stephanie, I read your blog since I lived in Mexico too, but I've never commented before. Today I needed to.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry if this comes across as harsh, but as someone with personal knowledge about how utterly devastating and damaging child sexual abuse is, you must protect this little girl. If nobody else will, you must. Even if it causes friction with your in-laws. Hell, you have problems with them anyway, so what's one more issue if it means saving this girl from a nightmare? What would you want someone to do if it was your child?
Take her to IMSS if nobody else will. You have good intentions with getting her therapy, but right now the priority is stopping the abuse in its tracks. Your in-laws won't kick you out. Family is everything in Mexico, and you have the upper hand in that abandoning you and your kids would reflect badly on them, not to mention you can get them in trouble for not taking care of the poor girl.
It is vital that Miguel is 100% in agreement with this plan, because he is their blood and you both will be stronger as a united front. Any man who wouldn't step in to protect his own family, an innocent child, is no kind of man and certainly not worthy of being your children's father. However, from what you write about him, I believe he will do the right thing. Remember: if you don't act now, this could be your child one day, and you would never forgive yourself.
One more thing - abuse isn't something that just happens at night, when nobody is around. She might well have been abused when everybody was around. It doesn't take long and with so many people, it is easy for someone to disappear unnoticed for a few minutes. Or if the abuse happened during the time when she was alone with the nephew, it doesn't mean it was him! You don't know if it was a relative, a neighbour or a family friend who might have been there too.
Good luck and please let us know how you went with the trip to IMSS.
Agree with the previous comment, please get her some help :(
ReplyDeleteSo, how do I take her to the IMSS? This was my first thought but, his sister will not let her out of her site now. After this happened, I wanted to take her with me to the store and she woudn't let me.
ReplyDeleteI am thinking about talking to one of his other sisters and getting her to help me with this becuase she would be able to get her to take her to the IMSS or to let her, she seems to listen to her better. I just know I agree completey with you no offense taken. I have a niece who went throught his and thanks to therapy she got through it. I also, have a friend whose niece killed herself because her mom didn't believe that her husband was raping her daughter everyday.
I am going to do something because, I can't ive with myself knowing this baby needs someone to help her.
Totally agree with the first commentor! This is such a horrible situation for that girl to be in. And, it sounds like she is too scared to ever speak up.
ReplyDeleteYou need to be tricky. And, lie if need be to take her there. I hope the best outcome for this. Please keep us informed.
So glad that you are the kind of person that won't just sit back and watch it all go down. Hopefully, with your help, you will get to the bottom of this.
Good luck!