Thursday, December 29, 2011

I am changing my mind... I need to vent.

I am changing my mind about building onto my mother in law's house. I have been here since last Friday and all was good until Miguel went out of town to work. Then, my youngest sister in law started with her attitude and also, my mother in law. Everything that goes wrong in this house seems to be mine or my kid's fault.
On Monday, I went to clean the bathroom, it looked like it hadn't been cleaned in God only knows how long so, I cleaned it. I scrubbed the walls, sink, toilet, and floor. It took a whole bottle of bleach. I opened the door so, I would choke as bad but, my sister in law and her lazy a$$ was laying on the bed and strted complaining about the smell of bleach. So, my mother in law told me to close the door. I continued cleaning it with the door closed and left it very clean. No thank yous or anything, just attitudes. An hour later the floor was filthy and the toilet had pee all over it! I wanted to kill!
The only people who appreciated what I did for them was my father in law and my husband. My mother in law can't clean with bleach, it causes her problems with her breathing but, they're 2 other women living in the house so, there was no excuse. My father in law is never home so, he doesn;t have time to clean it so, the fault lays on my sisters in law.
All was good but, on Tuesday, Miguel went out of town to do a construction job with his brother in law. That day was ok, everybody still treated us fine but, then, on Wednesday, it all changed. They started with their comments and attitudes. They either ignore us or say direct but, indirect comments, and at times direct comments. My nieces and nephews are older and are mean to the kids, when Miguel is here they don't allow it to happen but, when he is not here, I get on to the older ones, they start on my kids blaming everything on them. Today, they have started on the dogs, which are Miguel's babies, they talk about how they don't even want them here and only because of me are they here. They know this is not true that, Miguel insisted on bringing them and Miguel already told them that the dogs come with him and when he is here they act fine with them but, as soon as he leaves it is another story. I have never seen such hypocritic people in my life! Miguel thinks that, it will be better once we have our own space here but, I don't think so, the only thing that will help is that, I can get away from everything but, the attitudes will still be there. Plus, when Miguel is out of town, my mother in law will be the sitter and I will not tolerate someone being mean to my kids or even treating them different in any way! Plus, we are plannig on having a baby next year and I know I will be arguing with everyone on how too take care of my child. They still feed a 4 year old instead of letting him feed hisself for God's sake!!! Plus, they wash dishes in cold water and then blame everyone getting sick from walking on cold floors with no shoes or being outside without a jacket even though it is warm outside. I have told them and told them that, you get sick from germs being passed around from dishes not being cleaned correctly and not from cold floors but, nobody believes me here, and they even say I am stupid for thinking that. So, oh well, let them continue to get sick. The major problem is, they are sick and I have been here all week so, of course, I am sick now, too! I try to wash the dishes in hot water but, they poured out the water I had  heated (they don't have the water heater connected to the kitchen, just the shower)
So, with all these risks, I am seriously thinking about changing my mind but, I am first going to let Miguel talk to them and see if, things change, They should know by now, that, I already have moved us an hour and a half  from here and they know I am the one who convinced Miguel to build on here and I can be the one who takes him even further away and I will do that if it means that we will be happy and they will only see him once every few years, I don't care, my kids and my marraige come first for Miguel and myself.

Sorry for the long complaint, I just had to vent.


  1. Thats what this blogging thing is for right. You have to be able to vent to someone, well I know I do. Sorry you are having so much problems with your in-laws. Honestly I would be scared to make the decision of building on to that house too. You and your kids definetly come first, do what is going to make you happy.

  2. Definetly think about building on to your in-laws house. Try making a list with the pros and cons of doing it and that might help you make a decision. Good luck and Happy New Year!

  3. Good luck with the inlaws. I know it is common for families to stick together, but sometimes a little seperation can be a good thing. You know the saying "too close for comfort".... I'd think about moving maybe down the street or a couple of street over. Just a suggestion. Hope things calm down some. Your kids and hubby definitely come 1st! =)

  4. People have different ideas, and you can't change the actions and ideas of others, especially how they run their households.
    If they aren't going to change and you aren't going to change, living in such close proximity is going to be very difficult. The power struggle will cause friction, and your husband will be caught in the middle which is not an enviable position.

  5. @Estrellita: I understand that people have different ideas but, it is one thing to disagree on things but, to treat us bad when Miguel is not around, now that is another thing, it is wrong. I would never treat anyone like that, in my opinion that is hypocrisy (spelling?)